抽煙被老婆教訓

Warning: file_put_contents(Tpl/dysjjc.cn//cache_html/869440941b7ff5b407721bd06ceea079): Failed to open stream: No space left on device in /www/wwwroot/www.Jx.com/index.php on line 151
抽煙被老婆教訓 - 哈哈段子榜 - 讀客網-閱讀領航者

首頁> 哈哈段子榜

2026-04-18 07:24:28 來源：哈哈笑話網閱讀數：1076

吃完飯，心裏堵的慌，便在客廳裏抽煙，兒子一邊看動畫片一邊警告我，看我沒有反應，便去廚房找我老婆告狀。老婆：“我知道了，但媽媽現在手沒空，你幫我收拾他吧!兒子學著我老婆的樣子，一手叉腰一手把我手裏的煙掐掉，罵道：“老劉，你丫是不是想死呀!一天到晚就知道抽抽抽，你忘記了你叔怎麼死的嗎?肺癌!你說你這麼大人了，怎麼還像你兒子一樣不懂事......”正說著兒子好像想起了什麼，也不管我了，回去廚房對我老婆抱怨道：“媽媽，我怎麼就不懂事了......”...

上一篇：新婚之夜下一篇：流氓不可怕，就怕流氓有文化！

欄目推薦

基本文件流程錯誤 SQL 調試

/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/public/index.php ( 1.70 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/base.php ( 1.71 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Loader.php ( 12.70 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/composer/autoload_static.php ( 7.09 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Error.php ( 4.00 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/psr/log/Psr/Log/LoggerInterface.php ( 3.04 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Container.php ( 17.20 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/App.php ( 27.58 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Env.php ( 2.85 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Config.php ( 9.71 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/convention.php ( 11.74 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/tags.php ( 1.08 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Hook.php ( 5.58 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/common/behavior/Config.php ( 1.74 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/common.php ( 31.42 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/facade/Request.php ( 6.32 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Facade.php ( 3.44 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Request.php ( 57.54 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/function.php ( 1.38 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/helper.php ( 20.40 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/addons.php ( 0.45 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/app.php ( 6.20 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/cache.php ( 1.59 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/captcha.php ( 0.96 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/cookie.php ( 1.12 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/database.php ( 2.16 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/log.php ( 1.28 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/session.php ( 1.06 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/template.php ( 2.07 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/token.php ( 1.40 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/trace.php ( 0.84 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/config/version.php ( 0.91 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/symfony/polyfill-php80/bootstrap.php ( 1.50 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/symfony/polyfill-intl-normalizer/bootstrap.php ( 0.71 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/symfony/polyfill-php72/bootstrap.php ( 1.89 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/symfony/polyfill-php72/Php72.php ( 6.55 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/symfony/polyfill-intl-idn/bootstrap.php ( 4.52 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/symfony/polyfill-mbstring/bootstrap.php ( 7.07 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/ralouphie/getallheaders/src/getallheaders.php ( 1.60 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/guzzlehttp/psr7/src/functions_include.php ( 0.15 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/guzzlehttp/psr7/src/functions.php ( 13.09 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/guzzlehttp/promises/src/functions_include.php ( 0.16 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/guzzlehttp/promises/src/functions.php ( 9.89 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/guzzlehttp/guzzle/src/functions_include.php ( 0.16 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/guzzlehttp/guzzle/src/functions.php ( 9.70 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/overtrue/pinyin/src/const.php ( 0.49 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/topthink/think-captcha/src/helper.php ( 1.54 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/facade/Route.php ( 3.84 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Route.php ( 25.84 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/route/Domain.php ( 7.08 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/route/RuleGroup.php ( 16.45 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/route/Rule.php ( 28.92 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/route/RuleItem.php ( 8.84 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/route/RuleName.php ( 3.92 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/facade/Validate.php ( 4.83 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Validate.php ( 43.93 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/vendor/topthink/think-helper/src/helper.php ( 7.35 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Db.php ( 7.67 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Lang.php ( 7.38 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Log.php ( 8.92 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/log/driver/File.php ( 8.97 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/lang/zh-cn.php ( 12.58 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/route/route.php ( 0.73 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/route/route_cms.php ( 1.61 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/facade/Config.php ( 1.52 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/facade/Env.php ( 1.17 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/extend/libs/Cache_factory.php ( 2.99 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/facade/Cache.php ( 2.06 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Cache.php ( 3.27 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/cache/driver/File.php ( 7.99 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/cache/Driver.php ( 8.64 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/common/behavior/InitHook.php ( 1.54 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/facade/Hook.php ( 1.46 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/cms/behavior/Hooks.php ( 1.16 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/extend/sys/Hooks.php ( 2.54 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/View.php ( 5.74 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/view/driver/Think.php ( 6.12 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Template.php ( 47.31 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/template/driver/File.php ( 2.29 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/cms/function.php ( 10.43 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/route/dispatch/Module.php ( 5.19 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/route/Dispatch.php ( 9.26 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/cms/config/paginate.php ( 0.85 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Middleware.php ( 5.34 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Cookie.php ( 7.35 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Session.php ( 14.13 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Debug.php ( 7.57 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/cms/controller/Index.php ( 14.82 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/cms/controller/Cmsbase.php ( 1.40 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/member/controller/MemberBase.php ( 2.76 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/common/controller/Homebase.php ( 2.42 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/common/controller/Base.php ( 0.93 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Controller.php ( 7.53 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/traits/controller/Jump.php ( 4.76 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/member/service/User.php ( 13.62 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/facade/Cookie.php ( 1.58 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/facade/Url.php ( 1.13 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Url.php ( 13.22 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/cms/model/Cms.php ( 22.75 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/common/model/Modelbase.php ( 2.08 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Model.php ( 28.52 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/model/concern/Attribute.php ( 17.64 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/model/concern/RelationShip.php ( 20.60 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/model/concern/ModelEvent.php ( 6.04 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/model/concern/TimeStamp.php ( 2.58 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/model/concern/Conversion.php ( 7.84 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/db/Connection.php ( 58.93 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/db/connector/Mysql.php ( 6.22 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/db/builder/Mysql.php ( 5.85 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/db/Builder.php ( 36.76 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/db/Query.php ( 105.00 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/db/Expression.php ( 1.11 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/runtime/temp/b25af210e19fb8c29f7e0e2ff09ee2bb.php ( 16.62 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/model/Collection.php ( 3.23 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Collection.php ( 13.60 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/cms/model/Category.php ( 6.45 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/application/cms/taglib/CmsTagLib.php ( 7.67 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/exception/ErrorException.php ( 1.68 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Exception.php ( 1.61 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/exception/Handle.php ( 9.37 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/Response.php ( 9.68 KB )
/www/wwwroot/www.dysjjc.cn/thinkphp/library/think/debug/Html.php ( 4.02 KB )

0.058763s